We need variations in our lives. Writing the Blog is one variation. Listening to TraXX is another.
It's times like this that I feel very contented with my life. To be free I cannot have any dependencies. I cannot revert to the 3 Cs no matter what.
I need to have peace, sanity and robust health. That's all that counts.
Els is a drug. She is my dopamine hit. I need to break the addiction. At the same time I want to make her hooked on me. I guess my mission now is to make her reciprocate the feeling of dependency.
That is bad. It should be interdependence, not what I am trying to achieve now. It is insidious.
Nevertheless it is the name of the game. It is a Pussy Conquest Game. It is a game I intend to win. I think I am succeeding. I had seized the walled city. From now on it's about looting. She is vulnerable right now.
At the same time I genuinely like this girl. I want her to be happy with the things I do for her. She is nonjudgmental. I guess she is pretty innocent and I cannot resist exploiting her innocence.
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You know Sarah, I am counting the hours to hear her laughter and her dorky humors. I never met a girl like that in my life.
This 2 years is the honeymoon phase I am sure. Soon I will get tired of her. So until the time comes, I will make use of the window to express my joy in giving.
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Let me try to get into her mindset. What is it like being pursued? Is it fun? She likes it I'm sure. Just like this Britney's song:
This song reminded me with the fling I had with Nora Manaf. Boy, I do have a lot of hangups when comes to women.
As long as she is playing according to the rules of the game I am fine. She is still playing the girly girl game with me. It's like falling in love with a teenager. I like the feeling very much.
I guess that's what thought invasion is all about. To capture the top of the mind share.
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